The Wire

Family and Friends

There are good days. Then there are bad days. But what matters most in the end is that our family and friends are in good health and happy. I realize that I have family and friends who truly care about me, and I do not appreciate them enough. It really makes me want to give them all I can give them. I mean it. My resolution for 2009 will be to 1) Push for the things I really want in life
2) At the same time, do what I can for those I care about, as much to my ability as possible.



Photo is of Christmas Dinner with the Huang's.

Defeated Queen

敗犬 is a recent term used in Japan to describe modern day women over the typical age for marriage who are fairly successful in their careers, yet single. In both Japan and Taiwan, there are more and more of these single women over the age of the 30. It's not such a bad thing and is just simply reality. It's a phenomenon I, myself am soon to experience.

There is a new drama coming out soon in Taiwan called 敗犬女王 (Defeated Queen) which really brings out the issues of this topic. I'm definitely interested in taking a look once it comes out.


Synopsis

What will happen when Shan Wu Shuang (單無雙), a 33 year old beautiful, hardworking yet single woman, meets Lucas (盧卡斯), a 25 year old romantic and handsome regular worker? There is an 8 year age difference – what kind of story would then be created? A story that will let us laugh and let us cry. I’m not defeated! I’m the Queen!

Graduation, Fun Fun Fun

Graduations can be long and boring. The Art Center School of Design made a point to display the work for each graduating student, which made it all the more interesting. Congrats to my sister Tiffany for finishing her Masters in Broadcasting Media (Film).

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Wonder of the World

New scenes filmed in class:

This is the 2nd scene of a play by David Lindsay-Abaire called Wonder of the World. Cass, played by Nicole Rosselle, and Kip, played by me, meet for the first time on a bus to Niagra Falls as they both head on a journey to escape "something in their lives". This is the beginning of their journey. Filmed on 12/7/08.




Improv scene created and filmed in class on 11/22/08. There were some technical difficulties with the audio from one of the cameras being used. The scene is about a turning point for marriage between a young couple. Played by Sachin Mehta and I.

Accidents Happen, Not So Accidently

I hope I have learned my lesson! I've been trying not to do this for a while, but sometimes I peek over and see my BlackBerry Pearl flashing a small red light, and I can't help but check the email as I am in stuck on the 60 Fwy horrifying traffic. I figured I'm only moving 15 miles per hour...what else am I gonna do? Well of course it happened. I stepped on the gas peddle, looked down on my phone, and look up only to find myself braking frantically...and boom! Yes I bumped this old red caravan ahead of me. I roll my eyes to acknowledge the disappointment I have for myself, as I wave to have him pull over to side of the freeway. Luckily I check the red car's rear end and my bumper and it looks like there's minimal damage, if any. As I greet the red car owner, this African American in his late 20's from Louisiana, he comes out to smile at me. He explained that this was the accident he got in recently and the truck that hit him is already paying for the rear end damages, and that I have nothing to worry about. He wanted to assure me to not let this accident ruin my day. I could not believe my ears. I hit a guy and he's trying to comfort me. We ended the conversation with an awkward hug and handshake. That made my morning.

Two New Random Things

I would just like to share 2 new things I've tried recently.

1) I finally attended my first Laker game at the Staples center. With premiere seats we could order food there, but the view is much more worthy to note.

2) Tried the Guppy House restaurant in Hacienda Heights. Perhaps it was just too early in the day (11:30am), but the staff was doing a great job cleaning every inch of the place and the waitress did constant come over to check if all was okay. The food was decent, although spicy noodles is not my cup of tea.

Taking Charge

I decided at this moment that I am going to take charge of my life by picking and choosing how I use my time. My energies need to be focused on what is important to me, and not just what other people think is important for me. You see, it's easy to get confused on figuring that part out because it's hard to see things clearly on your own. You often need outsiders to lead you the way. However, and perhaps in a stubborn way, I know that I need to be the ultimate decision maker for myself. 

Come to think of it, part of the reason I get confused is because I am a different person at different times:

• Entrepreneur
  
• Actor
• Daughter
• Sister
• Loner
• Friend
• Pleaser
• The Responsible One
• Lazy Doer
• Storyteller
• Blogger
• Risk Taker
• Whimp
• Day Dreamer

I'm constantly switching between these everyday. One thing I really need to be is STRONGER.

The Fourth Most Populous City of California

After visiting San Francisco so many times, I still haven't figured out how I really feel about the city. For some reason, there's always been a sense of distance I felt from this popular place. In reality, there's enough diversity and interesting people to make it a fun city to experience. However, there are times when it becomes difficult to really define what San Francisco is really about. One thing that made this trip different than the past trips is that I really wanted to give it another try. I wanted not just to see through it from a tourist's eyes, but as someone who could really enjoy the appeal of this grand location. My only conclusion is that I do appreciate it much more now, but my understanding of it has not gotten any better. Hopefully next time it will.

Photos: http://www.flickr.com/photos/8766636@N02/sets/72157611276934553/

Baby Come Back....to the Kitchen

Baby come back
Any kind of fool could see
There was something in everything about you
Baby come back
You can blame it all on me
I was wrong and I just can't live without you

Yes...baby come back to the kitchen. Recognize this cool old groove by Ambrosia? I've been into this song for a while. But what's new is I'm trying to get myself use to cooking again. My latest dishes are the "Better Than Sex" Chocolate Cake and the Korean Soon DuBu (Hot Tofu Hot Pot). There were definitely flaws with both since it was both my first time, but I know where to improve, which is the important part.

Golf and Halibut

I enjoyed two more "firsts" today.

1) I played on a real golf course for a game of 9-hole today. I'm quite horrible at it, but it was still fun.



2) I cooked my first halibut with artichoke and tomatoes. It didn't come out as tasty as I imagined so I may pass on making it again.

The Decisions For Evacuation

I never thought I'd have to evacuate due to a fire coming close to our home. Figuring out what to pack and bring in the car is such a hard decision making process. I first went for my clothes. Now do I pack for the purpose of staying away from home for a few days? Or do I pack as if the house might get burned down. Which dress do I really want to keep? Should I bother with most of my underwear? As if these questions in my mind weren't dumb enough. I had to decide on what items were easy-to-carry, yet expensive and harder to replace. Of course I looked hard and long at the Wii that I do not normally play at all. I know it's still hard to purchase so of course I pack along with my mini-dvs and cd collection. Those of us that live in Diamond Bar were very fortunate to have the luxury of to evacuate with our valuable belongings. We were even more fortunate that fire fighters and the weather condition allowed all homes to be safe from the fire.

Here are some articles regarding this Triangle Complex Fire:

Diamond Bar evacuees allowed to return home

Triangle Complex Firehome

Diamond Bar Evacuations Lifted, Snoop Dogg to Return Home

The Bad Dream

I hate to be negative on this blog, but I'd rather be honest than not. Today was a crummy day. Nothing bad happened, but nothing happened.... Well something did happen, but it was part of my dream last night. I dreamt that I had cancer and had only a few days if any to live. I was trying to live every moment by telling the people I loved that I do love them. Afterwards, I just anticiped for it to happen, just like that. I knew I wasn't ready to die just yet so I just kept thinking about what I needed to do, over and over again. Of course I woke up feeling extremely heavy, not really wanting the day to start. And now it's 16 hours later, and I have go back to sleep soon. Alone. Crummy.

Latest Projects Update

Just an update on some latest projects. Here's Jack's edited montage that he has on the Acting With the Masters website:


Scene from Glengarry Glenn Ross - We shot part of this outdoors (on location) which was fun and cool at the same time:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JeUYKls5lE0

Hip Hop Dance Class: 10.27.08
Instructor: Brim
Song: Khia - What They Do
Studio: Athletic Garage in Pasadena
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yc6Tenq4B6g

One of Those Strange Weekends

So this was a post that I had begun two weekends ago and never posted nor completed. For one thing I couldn't find the gist of the topic I wanted to talk about, and two, I was simply too lazy. I had one those very typical yet very not-so-typical for me type of weekend.

I had eaten at Daikokuya, that very popular ramen place in Little Tokyo, many times before, but this time I was by myself. I know, I know, that is not strange at all, but it's been a while since I've had dinner on my own at a sit down place where I literally waited for 45 mins before being seated. The biggest difference in eating on your own is you tend to eat much faster because there's no time for talk, at all. You can wander your eyes everywhere, but you can only do that so many times before other people start noticing.

The other amazing thing I accomplished is much more of a stretch. I was abandoned at the Lowes in City of Industry by my mother and sister with no car. I walked aimlessly at first, trying to search for a place to have lunch, by myself again. After gulping down my pork chop rice at a local cafe joint, and many failed attempts to call and plead for anyone to pick me up and drive me home, I finally decide I really needed to find an alternative to get back home. So I took the public bus - Foothill Transit for first time in this area. Two bus rides, $2, a short walk later, I arrived home safely. Of course it only took 1 hour and 10 minutes for what would have taken only 15 minutes to get home by car. Fun stuff. I still love public transportation, but I just hate how long it takes in the suburbs.

Restless Night

Maybe it's the caffeine from the UCC Cafe au Lait siphoned coffee I drank tonight, but I am feeling extremely restless for this late in the night. It's one of those days where I'm filled with an urgency to get myself involved in something that requires intensity or passion. Nothing dirty if that's what it sounds like, but rather something that can fill me with emotions or joy. Perhaps it's a good sign to start memorizing my lines for this next scene I will have to act in class. 

Awkward Discovery

Here's another improvisational scene done in class with Amanda. It takes place in a wine bar where two friends meet for a first time in a long time. One finds out through the conversation that she is currently dating an ex-fiance of the other friend. The rough edit cut is in. The wonderful photos were taken by Luciana Dias.

In real life, the storyline is a bit dramatic. but not impossible. We all know the awkwardness of friends dating the ex of other friends . However, it's life...deal with it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jaqb2m_k8O8

A Lover's comPromise

I'm finally seeing this version for the first time. This was a short narrative film shot in November 2007, a year ago from now. It was one of the most fun times I've had working on a project. Makes me want to get started again...

http://lordbuistudios.com/Directing/ShortFilms/narrativeShortFilms.html

The San Fernando Valley

This was another piece I was lucky to edit. Watching this showed me how simplicity can really go a long way in telling a story. Sachin and John did a great job in making all the transitions without the use of verbal language.

Never Too Old To Try

Unfortunate for you and fortunate for me, I have been fascinated that my new Blackberry Pearl has a video recorder, so hence the craziness of my video postings. Although the piece video is of a hip hop class with a sub teacher, later that night I discovered there was a break dance class. I had to laugh at myself...an almost 30 year old girl, taking break dance for the first time. I will admit, I did love it!

Hip Hop Dance Class - A Millie

Today I learned one of my favorite routines from Brim's hip hop dance class at Athletic Garage in Pasadena. "A Millie" by Lil Wayne. The video was taken with a cell phone video camera under low lighting, so forgive it's poor quality.

Makes me want to groove soon!

Raging Roomates

This was another improvisation scene that was pieced together in class. We tried to go the funny route, and hopefully succeeded. I had a hard time getting into the "acting" aspect actually and wished I could have done a ton of things differently. But it is what it is. Please excuse the swearing...

The Cafe

We've been working on improv scenes in class shooting them as we go, which has been turning out pretty well. Here are 3 scenes so far:

Week 3 "The Cafe"


Week 2 "The Firing"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBB6QZOQoag

Who I Am I To Be

In my opinion, there are three sides to us as human beings: 1) Who we are expected to be 2) Who we want to be, and 3) Who we need to be. These three sides are constantly at battle with each other and I realize that life would be so much easier if all 3 of those were the exactly the same, but that is almost impossible. So far, I've been living life mostly as the person who I need to be and expected to be. I'm constantly in conflict every time I lean towards who I want to be and find some way to kick myself back against it.

It is so frustrating. Even though I realize what is stopping me from being who I want to be, there are simply too many expectations and responsibilities in the way that I get make me fear and stray from that path. Arghhhh!

It's Sunny, No It's Raining

This morning as I drove to work to start a new week, there were subtle, light rain drops falling from the sky. And yet, the sun was out, bright and strong. This combination is definitely one of my favorite type of weather conditions, giving me a bright road ahead, yet letting me feel the liveliness of the cold water.

Let's just hope the U.S. financial crisis will start looking this way soon.

You Are My Eyes - 你是我的眼

So I'm stuck on this one Chinese song for the past 2 days. I think I have teared up a few too many times already. At work, at home, in the car, you name it. I think the lyrics and melody both move me. The song is about you being my eyes and showing me the world as you see it. The song is by a Taiwanese artist, whom I really know nothing about other than that he has lost is ability to see. I thought about what it would be like to lose my sight, and I know my life would be completely different if that were to happen. Time to stop things for granted, right? To the right is what I did get to see in D.C. which I am now just showing.


Version 1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDU6jebYHd0
Version 2: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbcJ0QFfPIo

I found another blog with his own English translation so I won't bother translating: http://xinqing-xinjing.blogspot.com/2008/01/you-are-my-eyes.html


你是我的眼
作詞：蕭煌奇　作曲：蕭煌奇　編曲：陳飛午

如果我能看得見　就能輕易的分辨白天黑夜
就能準確的在人群中牽住你的手

如果我能看得見　就能駕車帶你到處遨遊
就能驚喜的從背後給你一個擁抱

如果我能看得見　生命也許完全不同
可能我想要的我喜歡的我愛的　都不一樣

眼前的黑不是黑　你說的白是什麼白
人們說的天空藍　是我記憶中那團白雲背後的藍天
我望向你的臉　卻只能看見一片虛無
是不是上帝在我眼前遮住了簾　忘了掀開

你是我的眼　帶我領略四季的變換
你是我的眼　帶我穿越擁擠的人潮
你是我的眼　帶我閱讀浩瀚的書海
因為你是我的眼　讓我看見這世界就在我眼前

The Decision

Can't View It? Click here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6j-HwNazGo

This is what happens when I prepare an exercise in class and we decide to have the class direct and shoot it. In case you can't tell, it's about a relationship gone sour. She comes home to him sleeping and leaving a mess, but decides not to stay in the same room as him, therefore making her final decision to... (watch the video). Edited by Jack H.

It's suppose to be a sad scene, but I can't help but keep giggling.

Project created by: Jack Hannibal, Sachin Mehta, Nicole Rosselle, Tofiq Sajawal, John Scillieri, and Shawna

Loss of Innocence

Perhaps I'm over thinking it. It's sad, but the truth is, I'm feeling a loss of innocence lately. No I haven't done anything crazy, over my head, or simply bad...at least that I would admit so. It's just that somehow a protection shield formed around me that's preventing me from caring. No, I haven't lost hope or the sense of optimism, but I can see myself falling into the trap not allowing myself to be vulnerable, therefore not feeling.

If this is what comes with age and experience, it's sure a funny thing.

Addiction

What is an addiction? What kind of personalities are more prone to addictive behavior? I often ponder on these questions and have never been sure of the answer. The two traits a person needs to have to become addicted is weakness and boldness. Normally, addiction is a negative thing, however, it often comes with passion and adventurism, both of which can be considered good.

After watching the season three episode of Grey's Anatomy - Love/Addiction, I couldn't agree more with the few ending quotes by Meredith Grey.

“The thing about addiction – it never ends well because eventually whatever it was that was getting us high stops feeling good and starts to hurt.”

“Still, they say you don’t kick the habit until you hit rock bottom. But how do you know you’re there?”

“Sometimes, letting it go hurts even worse.”

I normally don't allow myself to get to addicted to anything, fearing that will it hurt me the deeper I let myself go. But of course, there are certain things I cannot resist and have been a victim of this process. I just hope in the end, after the addiction is long over, it can only make us stronger.

痞子英雄

First of all I apologize if you don't know understand Mandarin but it's not that important. After watching this clip of the process of making this new Taiwan drama from a director I simply love, I feel extremely emotional. For one, to me, this is what film making is about. It's where the passion really lies. It's also extremely inspiring to me, to find that the drive to creating this project is not just to tell a story or to make something great, but to create an environment where everyone is just as passionate about it. It's truly amazing and I can't help but wonder why I'm not on that road yet.

My Blueberry Nights

I finally completed my mission to watch My Blueberry Nights, a film by Wong Kar Wai, one of my favorite directors. The performance by Natalie Portman and Rachel Weisz blew me away, and of course Norah Jones' character kept me wanting to know more. I won't go into detail about style or the filmmaking process, even though there's a ton to say about that. I will say that theme of this story, or stories rather, is about letting go. We often hold on to things that are so important to us that we have a hard time letting go at the moment. Timing is everything. Up until lately, I thought I was good at it. I certainly have a lot to learn.

Summer is Coming to an End

Today I spent 90 minutes to travel 25.3 miles in the morning. This must mean school has started, which then means summer is almost over. I know it's time to pack the laziness away and get going with life again, but it's not easy this time around.

Anyhow, I was reminded recently of the song "Full of Grace" by Sarah McLachlan, which has been a long time favorite of mine and thought it would be some what appropriate to the atmosphere these days.

South Beach Miami

Strange things can happen in South Beach Miami.

~ USPS Box becomes a Jedi Master
~ Paparazzi photos of non-famous men
~ Girl lays on top of a bar table
~ Girls begin to arm wrestle
~ Lots of empty glasses
~ Cups come in interesting shapes
~ T-Storms in the middle of the afternoon
~ Apartments start looking like NYC studios

Strange things inevitably become GOOD things.

The Later It Is, The Harder It Gets

I'm going to have to return to ambiguity again. Today I'm staying strong. However, the later it is in the night, the harder it gets...


To the right is something I found on wordle.net that actually took words from this blog prior to this entry and put it into a collage of art. If I had the choice to add a few more words in there, it would be: "no" "regrets" "pain" "missing" "difficult" "wish" "timing" "better".

Under the Tuscan Sun

I finally watched the 2003 adapted movie directed by Audrey Wells : Under the Tuscan Sun. The story was amusing enough to keep me wanting to find out more, and although it wasn't a "huge" film, there were many quotes in it that I found interesting.

"Regrets are a waste of time. They're just the past crippling you in the present"

"They built tracks over the Alps to connect Venice and Vienna they built the track before there was even a train in existence that could make the trip… they built the tracks because they knew the train would come."

"Unthinkably good things can happen... even late in the game... it's such a surprise"

I have to believe that this is true, and I really do. As of late, I think I have caught a glimpse of something that is amazingly good, and it has been overwhelming me like crazy.

Feel Alive

No pictures this time, just a simple post to compensate for the complex emotions I have right now. I guess what I can say is that I'm happy to be alive, to feel alive. Life would be boring without some ups and and downs and as long as there is an upside to a situation, there is always hope. Bittersweet is how I feel right now, and who can ask for more?

Being Active Again

Feels good to be active again.







Can you spot me?

What is Love?

On the bus ride back from Mexico, each person in the bus was suppose to answer the question: What is Love? Here are some of the answers (coming from mostly 50 year old Taiwanese folks):

- Acceptance
- Knowing their faults, and still loving them
- Happiness
- Fighting, fighting, fighting
- Compromise
- Being happy together
- I still don't know what love is
- Unconditional
- Giving them the space and freedom to accomplish their dreams
- My Answer: Unselfish and forgiveness

Sometimes it's hard to imagine the need for love and passion as you get older, but nothing changes, ever.

First Entry From My Phone

This will be my first blog from my phone. Summer seems to make me feel lazy to do only fun things rather than useful things. Its almost like I want to a hold on learning for a bit and relax my mind. On the other hand I'm ready for some bigger changes in life but unsure how to go about it. There must be more to life than just my own happiness.

Just received this from a friend actually. Absolutely amazing and inspiring:

Chicago

Can't help but love Chicago in the summer. With a few rain drops, gusty winds, and a ton of sunshine, the city has a lot to offer in the month of June.


No matter the score, Cub fans will always be Cub fans. No matter how tired of walking you get, there's always the train to take. No matter how discouraged of love you get, watching Amy and Patrick always brings hope. Congrats to the new husband and wife.

Photos taken by Alan: http://picasaweb.google.com/alanliusaccount/AmyAndPatrickSWedding

So Close

I was this close to doing the crazy thing, and things just didn't work out. It must be God's sign of protection. I almost know for sure that this is for the better. But what does that mean?

Back to the safe bubble I go.

Not Feeling Well

Not feeling so well today, or the past 2 days as a matter of fact. Not exactly the best timing to have a fever since there's an overwhelming amount of things going on right now. I'm currently trying to make a decision on whether to do something I know is so irrational but perhaps fun. At this age, I don't know of irrational is a good thing anymore. Should I or should I not?

It's That Time of Year

It's that time of year again.....graduation time. I was driving back home and during the stop light break, the graduating class of Diamond Bar High was leaving their ceremony in their purple robes. It's the time of year to leave the past behind and start a chapter of your life. There's a mixed feeling of sadness and excitement in the air. Time to face the music!

The World as We See It

I was having a conversation the other day about how some of us who pretty much grew up and stayed in the suburbs of the Greater Los Angeles area, where most of our friends are primarily of the same ethnic and financial background, have been confined in our shell. We stay safe in our own familiar world and are usually conservative in our ways of life, not taking any big risks that go out of our comfort zone. I admit that I have fallen victim to this, and have spent the later part of my twenties finding peeps holes to get out a bit. There's a whole new world out there, whether just 30 miles away, or half way around the world and it's about time I get a sense of that. I don't know if traveling helps, but it's better then staying put in one place forever. I may never become someone completely different, but I can always hope to expand my horizons. The Washington D.C. trip has really brought this to my attention and I will be blogging in detail more about those adventures.

* Photo taken from the United States Botanic Garden of Washington D.C.

Worst Feeling Ever

You know what is one of the worst feelings ever? Having to eat french fries without ketchup and having to eat chicken nuggets without sauce!

This only happens in 2 situations, which is almost all the time for me:
1) I'm in the car driving and I don't want to wait to get home to eat the fries because I have to eat it in while it's hot.
2) Someone buys it for you and forgets to ask for ketchup or sauce.

How upsetting right?

I know...this is so random.

Umbrella Dance

Every Sha-la-la-la
Every Wo-o-wo-o
Still shines
Every shing-a-ling-a-ling
That they're startin' to sing's
So fine.

Every wonder what it takes to keep other people going and to how they can just put themselves out there? A lot it is about risk taking and just "doing it". Sometimes it's confidence built through out time and experience. Moments from the past may not be necessarily be repeated but we can certainly use them to make us what we are now.

Photo: Mom performing the umbrella dance that she choreographed at the Taiwan Fest-LA at the Union Station. She's never taken dancing as a profession, but has adapted everything she's learned from the past and used it to give it all she's got.

Lately

Lately I've been staring in the mirror
Very slowly picking me apart
Said, I'm trying to tell myself that I have no reason
With your heart
~ Verse from Jodeci & Stevie Wonder's "Lately"

Lately there's been a slight change in me. I've been "feeling" less by "doing" more. In reality I've been in my own comfort zone for too long and it's getting scary having to stay here. I've temporarily stopped hoping for what's to come in terms of love and have been concentrating on pushing forward to keep myself going. It's strange but I find myself constantly searching for things to do that I love every single day. It's as if I don't know what those things are yet.

I am blessed, for having the chance to recognize these things and making it tangible.

*Photo of a fire we saw on the 60 FWY pass through City of Industry

Obsession

This entry is dedicated to the one who is obsessed with Alicia and every other woman who has become an inspiration to us. Thank you for sharing this video...you know who you are. Funny how we still have role models even as we get older. There is something about strong, intelligent women that continue to give us hope that we can belong to something greater than our imagination.

The idea of taking a trip on your own and feeling comfortable with it is admirable and inspirational. Look out D.C., here I come.

Video: Alicia Keys Talks About Adventure in Peru on Letterman

Rabbit Hole

I didn't grow up learning to appreciate the theater or any type of live performance as a matter of fact. Besides an occasional field trip with school, I didn't know much about drama outside of what I knew in the movie theaters. Things have changed slightly since I was a child. It's not that I've gained some type of magical wisdom and put on my "I know better" hat on. I simply have new agendas to being there, and it certainly makes all the difference in the world. One agenda would just be to find myself immersed into a storyline so much so that you forget you are watching a play that's right in front your face. This experience can be magical and extremely moving. Another would be to become a better actor. This part, of course, I will not get into.

After watching Becca (Jennifer Ruckman) and Howie (Jonathon Lamer) trying to hold on to what they have after their 4 year old son died in an car accident in the Orange County premiere of David Lindsay-Abaire's "Rabbit Hole," playing at The Chance Theater, I just can't wait to watch my next play, whatever it may be. I also hope I can push myself further to whatever my next step shoud be.

If I Ain't Got You

Certain human beings continue to amaze me every day. Alicia Keys is one of them. As a performer, she is so infectious that she sucks you into her presence. As a singer, her voice completely comes out of her inner soul and allows you to be right there feeling it. As a musician, she plays the piano as if it's just an extension of her body. As a woman, she speaks volumes with every single audience member relating to her. And as a human being, she posses such an impossible confidence that you can't imagine what it must be like to be in her place.

What am I trying to say? I know I can be at some level of this type of existence soon if I push hard enough.

*This video is from her concert at the Staples Center. Filmed by Amy Lee.

Connecting the Body and Soul

I don't consider myself a spontaneous person. I'm not saying I need to follow a particular schedule or anything, but I don't just don't do strange things out of the blue all the time. Alright, who am I kidding? The older I get, the less constrained I become. After two hours of dance class one day, a classmate, whom I didn't even know the name of asked if I wanted to go to a dance showcase in West Hollywood. Mind you this was 10pm on Wednesday night and I had planned to go home and do some work. For some reason, I said yes, and little did I know this was the famous Carnival, a Choreographer's Ball at the Key Club where they show case over a hundred dancers. Upon entering the club, I could feel that I was in unfamiliar territory. I was surrounded by dozens of professional dancers, some b-boys, and some just to watch their favorite dancers. Among my favorite performances was the team choreographed by the famous Anthony Thomas, who had won awards for Janet Jackson's "Rhythm Nation." I've been holding off on writing anything about dancing for some time, because I don't feel that I have the write words to describe the beauty of dance just yet. All I know is that the there is something magical about it that connects your body, heart beat, and soul. If just merely watching it makes me feel that way, imagine what it must be like to actually do it. I can understand why some people live and breathe by it.

Of course, I didn't get home until 3:30am this night, which led to a pain work day the following morning.

A One Year Old is Always King

I salute to all the mommies and daddies who have thrown a birthday party for a one year old. I just watched, and even I was exhausted. A bunch of other infant and toddlers running around, chewing at everything they see, throwing any toy they can get their hands on around. Adults stay busy eating and then cleaning up after the kids and feeding them whatever might be edible to them. The one year old may never be aware that his/her birthday is being celebrated, but of course receives more toys than a day care center could hold.

1st Lesson learned: A one year old is always king
2nd Lesson learned: Be quick in stealing the cake before the kids get all of it
3rd Lesson learned: It's always worth it in the end

** Photo 1: Cake custom made by Tracy L - friend and pastry chef
** Photo 2: Tino excited about his new bike

Void of Emotion

I didn't realize this is until after I spoke about it, but tandem skydiving is more of a physical experience than an emotional one. Prior to getting on that plane and jumping 10,000 ft from the sky, I never gave the idea much thought. I had no strong feeling about it either way: no fear, no excitement, no happiness.....nada. It simply didn't seem like a big deal, and there was no anxiety attached to it. I don't know what it was that voided me of all emotion but in the end it probably took away from the experience than anything. When I was in the air, I felt the physical sensation more than anything. I always though that maybe I'd do a lot thinking in that big sky, but that didn't happen either.

Strange thing is, everything has been that way for me lately. I'm at ease with everything, it's been an emotionless journey for some time now. Perhaps I should be thankful. Or perhaps I'm missing out big time in life.

** Photo is of me Skydiving in Casa Grande, AZ.

Life Colors

I took this Life Colors survey online and this is what it came up with. I resent that last line "However, be careful that you don't live too much in the future. There are the realities of day-to-day living to think about." If I could help it, I truly would run away from the realities of every day. But what does that make me? The most pathetic coward I know.

Your Life Colors

You scored mainly in the Water-Sky quadrant. This 'Blue' quadrant highlights the water sign of your personality and your tendency to be cool and free-flowing in most circumstances. Water from the sky provides the necessary resources for growth and this is a feature of your approach to life. You will enjoy the freshness of new ideas and actively seek these out, either by talking to others or by reading.

People who map into this quadrant will enjoy examining problems or making discoveries. Consequently, you may sometimes tend to take your time in coming to decisions which affect your day-to-day life. If there are any uncertainties, your natural reaction will be to postpone things until you are sure.

You are unlikely to enjoy conflict situations which, more than likely, will create stress for you. In these circumstances you may well be a 'worrier' and this could affect your health. As a result you will usually move to defuse any potential conflicts well before they occur.

You will be a considerate person and choose your words carefully so that you don't upset others. Sometimes however, you may be so subtle that people don't realize what you are feeling about a particular issue. You may need to check that people fully understand your views and incorporate these into their decision making.

Being a sky person, you may well have a strong imagination which causes you to fantasize about the future. Future possibilities interest you greatly whereas the past is something you can readily put behind you. However, be careful that you don't live too much in the future. There are the realities of day-to-day living to think about.

** The photo is of me dressed up as a revolutionary girl in the Autumn shoot.

Soooo L.A.

Hiking is one of those great things anyone can do on an early morning of your day off. No matter what level you are at, you can get yourself to a destination at your own pace. After trying out Runyon Canyon in Los Angeles for the first time, I discovered that this hike is just "soooo L.A." Everyone is dressed up in their cute work out outfit, walking their adorable dogs. It is apparently a very popular park where you can take free yoga classes or just take a stroll to catch up with friends while trying to get some exercise in you busy schedule. My favorite part is the non-stop inclining steps, where you end up with a beautiful view of the smoggy city of Los Angeles and Hollywood sign. There's just no place like home.

Photos of this first time hike click here.

100% Pure Chocolate Passion

Chocolate is one of those things we take for granted as we all have easy access to good chocolate. I've always liked chocolate, but never put too much though into it. If it's in my visual proximity, I will naturally eat it. It wasn't until I received a box of Leonidas chocolates one day, in which I did not share even a piece to anyone else, and took my time to indulge a piece a day. So one day, at the Southwest terminal of the Las Vegas airport, I felt so bored I decided to shop inside this cute store called "Ethel's Chocolate." The lady working was nice enough to give me the details of each type of chocolate they made that I ended up hand picking 12 pieces of chocolate to put in box all for myself. After putting down most of the box on my own by having a piece a day, I now finally understand the love for chocolate. It's truly a sinful indulgence. I formally welcome chocolate as an addition to the joys of my life.

Sailing Takes Me Away

Sailing takes me away
To where I've always heard it could be
Just a dream and a wind to carry me
Soon I will be free
Soon I will be free
(lyrics from Christopher Cross' "Sailing")

I wish I could relate to this but with 3 hours of sleep and a bunch of junk food in my stomach, I think the lyrics should go something like this:

Sailing takes me to pain
To where my nauseousness takes over me
Just a wave and a wind to sicken me
Soon I will feel green
Soon I will be free

Don't get me wrong, I still love sailing. Next time I just have to be prepared and using some recommended Scopolamine.

* Photo from Marina Sailing off Long Beach. View more photos here, here, and here.

Hit and Run

I hope nobody who drives a white '05 or '06 Honda Civic reads this blog because I hit one today by accident. It was parked crooked in the shopping mall parking lot and as I was backing up, I dented the rear, tearing a lot of the paint off. The car had dents all over to begin with so I figured another won't hurt, right? I'm sick of having car troubles, so I looked around to see if anybody witnessed. Not one person around, so I jetted away. Sorry Civic, but it's your unlucky day. Happy April Fools Day :) This is a totally made up retarded story.

Expectations of a 29 Year Old Asian American Female in Los Angeles

Sometimes it's hard for me to understand the role of women in today's society. Well, "society" may be too general of a word. More specifically, I wonder what the expectations of an Asian American female living in the diversified world of Los Angeles are today. Not to sound pessimistic, but no matter how much we talk about stepping up the ladder or becoming more independent, much of the traditional views still stand. Not that it's uncommon for a thirty year old Asian American woman to be unmarried and concentrating on other parts of their lives instead, but it's not what is expected of them.
I'm an example of one that falls into this uncertainty. On one hand I want to meet those expectations to get married, raise a family, and live comfortably in a settled matter. On the other hand, I don't want it to be my only priority. I'm not a career oriented person, nor am I against marriage at all. I just happen to be one of those people that thrive off of being uncertain about tomorrow. Sure it gets lonely in that world, but there are natural highs that come off of certain type of experiences you are get only from that world.

** Pictures above from Liu Fang Yuan at the Huntington Library

Rock Band - Game or Music?

I'm not sure where to really start this entry. I'm not particularly big on video games, but now that I have a Wii, the next step is to wait for June 22 when Rock Band comes out for the Wii. This game tests your rhythm more than anything. Sad thing is, I have a real drum set, piano, and guitar sitting at home just collecting dust. However, I don't believe the game is any sort of replacement for real musical instruments. A game is just a game. Music, however, is truly one of the greatest gifts of life. Without it, my everyday would be that much less inspiring.

Swearing - The Pros and Cons

Ever since I encountered profanity as a child, I had naturally taught myself to never swear. There really wasn't a reason for it other than I simply thought it was a "bad" thing to do. So I basically grew up never cussing. It's a strange concept because I'm not against bad words at all and like hearing others use it with moderation. As a full grown adult though, especially after doing the Fat Pig scene (picture to the right), I do find the perks to using a swear word here and there.

Pros: Gets the point across period.

Cons: Just read this: http://www.cusscontrol.com/swearing.html

Conclusion: It has slowly become part of my vocabulary in my head, but I'm still afraid to show it in front of people who have known me for a long time who aren't use to hearing it from me. We'll see how it goes.

70 to 29? Just a Little on the Anti-Climatic Side

My first UCLA basketball game ever, and it's been 7 years since I graduated. It just reminds me that I have to regain my school spirit. I'm unfamiliar with March Madness, but I had my share of fun at the Honda center. The food there just isn't too tasty, but I do like the layout of the venue. Until the next game ...


* The picture to the top was taken with my Blackberry Pearl, in case you're not fancying the quality.

First Time's

There's a first time for everything. Here are a couple first times for today:

1) First time bumping into someone I know at an audition for the exact same role.
2) First time feeling like I miss someone that I didn't think I would miss.
3) First time listening to Khalil Fong's music (Chinese R&B - and great listen I have to say)
4) First time eating Seiro, white buckwheat Soba, at Otafuku in Gardena.
5) First time calling someone a best friend in front of another person without being asked.
6) First time posting a blog entry without a picture in it.

There's a first time for everything. And it happens every day.

Mallards in the Pool

Mallards in the Pool,
originally uploaded by Yolanda Huang.

7am in the morning, while in the midst of brushing my teeth, mom comes to my room excited to tell me that there are 2 beautiful ducks swimming in our pool. With the tooth brush still in my mouth, I rush outside with the camera to snap some shots.

Just by looking at the scene, you might think this to be such a romantic notion - male and female traveling hand in hand in a foreign land. However, after doing a little Wikipedia research, I find out "Mallards form pairs only until the female lays eggs, at which time she is left by the male." What a surprise right? It's a sad but typical phenomenon.

I guess this guy is not gay. According to Wikipedia, "Mallards also have rates of male-male sexual activity that are unusually high for birds. In some cases, as many as 19% of pairs in a Mallard population are male-male homosexual".

Nissan Spec Commercial Shoot

Nissan Spec Commercial Shoot,
originally uploaded by Yolanda Huang.

Giving up a morning of work and a 2 hour drive each way to be Keiko Wantanabe for a day.

Nerdy glasses and a lap coat. Doesn't that just scream fun?

Kickball, A Reminder of How We Never Grow Up

Who would have thought that celebrating a 29th birthday with a game of adult kickball could be so much fun. Don't they just bring back those junior high memories.

The memory I have of childhood kickball is when the the player up to kick is known to be a weak kicker, and everyone on the field just inches towards home base, assuming they are not going to kick beyond the pitcher. This is a total blow in confidence for the kicker, so I suggest he/she sucks it up and kicks the ball straight into the face of anyone in the opposing team. I guess not much has changed as adults. We are just as immature and competitive then ever.